


Finally seen the light

by CheezPleez



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes as Captain America, Canon Divergence - Post-Avengers (2012), Gen, Hurt Steve Rogers, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Loki (Marvel), Slow Burn, Stubborn Steve Rogers, Thanos Dies (Marvel), The Snap Doesn't Happen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:20:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25554979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheezPleez/pseuds/CheezPleez
Summary: After proper questions are asked and it is revealed that Loki was being used by Thanos he is housed with the Avengers so that they can keep an eye on him. In that time he finds that while he can tolerate most of the avengers there is something that draws him to a certain super soldier and he cannot put his finger on it.Steve is not thrilled with the idea of letting Loki with with them and while he's waiting for the shoe to drop he does believe in giving a fair shot. When it is his turn to watch Loki while the team is out on a mission he has a chance to get to know the got a little bit better.With the threat of Thanos looming and the race for the infinity stones beginning what could possibly go wrong.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, Loki & Steve Rogers, Loki & Thor (Marvel), Loki/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers & Avengers Team
Comments: 15
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this started off as a one shot but my finger slipped. I regret nothing.

It was now the new team policy. One person has to stay behind when they get a call. This was because Loki was now a resident in the tower. The last few months have been an adjustment for everyone but since it was proven he was being controlled by Thanos he had been cleared of his crimes. They had pretty much all had their turn at “babysitting” the god and every single one went without incident. That said Loki was after all a trickster and he seemed very quick to join in on Tony’s favorite pastime, messing with Steve Rogers.

To date the pranks had been mostly harmless. He had enchanted him so that he could only speak in his first language gaelic, making that day's mission rocky at best. Thor and Tony with help from Jarvis were able to translate but it was still rough. He had also changed Steve to look like a pig after Tony made a remark about how much food he and Thor consumed when together. Tony was sure to take plenty of pictures before Loki changed him back. He had also turned his pencils into worms. so to say he found it annoying to be benched when his turn came was an understatement. “Please, Tony switch spots with me. I will get the next one. You and I are the last ones to take our turn watching him. Maybe he can be trusted here on his own. He hasn’t hurt anyone.” Tony put his hands up “This was your idea bomb pop. We drew names to see who went when. I am NOT giving up my spot. You have to deal with reindeer games just like the others. I will get my chance soon enough. I’m sure he will be fine. He only screws with you when he has an audience and the audience is leaving for a few days, a week tops.” There was no winning this. He watched as the team left him on his pathetic task of making sure Loki didn't destroy the tower or all of New york…...again.

The first two days went pretty much as expected. Day three got complicated. Jarvis alerted him that Spiderman was sending out a distress call regarding a large snake that had come out of the ground in Queens. Before heading out to help he went to find Loki only to see him standing in the doorway peeling an apple. “Would you like an extra hand Captain?” He moved past him and stopped. “No Stay here. I can handle this.” 

“I cannot handle this” He said to himself as the snake had him wrapped up tightly. He had sent Spiderman to clear away civilians insisting that he could handle a snake. The “snake” in question was huge. Like something out of a bad horror movie. He had already been bitten several times and could now feel his ribs cracking under the pressure. The snake’s head suddenly lurched forward as it loosened its grip around him. He was surprised to see Loki standing beside the crumpled remains of the snake. “I offered my assistance although I am glad Jarvis seems to have the sense to call on me.” He staggered to his feet and gasped “I had it under control.” He eyed him suspiciously. “You and I have different ideas of control. The spiderling has crowd control handled, let's get you home.” He waved Loki off but did stumble back towards the tower. He just wanted a hot bath and his bed. 

“Would you like me to check the bites Captain?” He glanced over at Loki. “No they'll be fine. The serum takes care of that. Just need some rest. Ask Jarvis if you need anything.” He stepped off the elevator at his floor and Loki followed. “You don’t have to follow me.” He winced as he began to take off his shirt. “I know it’s just... You were fighting a large serpent. Even an enhanced soldier is not completely immune to injuries from the midgard serpent.” Steve paused. “I thought the midgard serpent was a myth.” Loki produced a bottle seemingly out of thin air. “Yes and No. Your people don’t have the exact information but it does or did exist. Clearly the noises of this blasted city finally woke it from its slumber. Here at least let me do something for the bruises and cuts.” He grabbed a towel and dabbed the contents of the bottle onto it. 

“My Ma used to use that to clean me up from fights.” Loki cocked his head. “Was she a witch?” He laughed “No, just a well trained nurse who knew which old wives tales really did work. That's useless to put on me before I get in the shower. Just leave it on the counter, I can handle it. Thank you.” Loki did as instructed and saw himself out. Steve headed for the bath. “Jarvis, please keep an eye on Captain Rogers for me. He can be as stupid as my brother sometimes and this is proving to be one of those moments.” 

Steve felt a little better after the shower. He was too tired to worry about the witch Hazel Loki left. He crawled into bed knowing he would wake up soon enough probably when he got hungry. When he woke up he felt like he was on fire as pain seared down his side. He pulled the blankets back noticing the sheets were sticking to his side. He carefully peeled it away to reveal the horrific hole where the small bite marks had been earlier. “That is not good” he breathed out and moved to sit up more. He could feel his head spin as he did so. “Hey Jarvis….call Loki.” His speech sounded slurred when he spoke. He was surprised at how quickly Loki was in the room. “I knew I shouldn’t have left you alone.” All he could do was look up at him as his vision faded out.

He woke up again shaking, Loki holding his hand. “Captain, I believe you were having a nightmare. You are alright now well, relatively alright. You do appear to be healing although from what Jarvis tells me at a significantly slower rate. The team should be back tomorrow though. I have not told them of your condition yet. Can you nod if you are getting any of this?” He slowly nodded. He felt so disoriented at the moment and his throat hurt like he had been screaming. “The poison from the serpent causes one to become delirious. You have been quite sick the past two days.” He pulled the blankets back to carefully inspect the bandages. “Looks like your serum is not completely equip for mythical snake venom. Do you think you can eat anything?” he settled back and took a deep breath. “I don’t know. I could use some water.” Loki nodded and left for a moment. 

“Jarvis has informed me that you do not care for cold drinks so I hope this will suffice." Loki handed him a glass of warm water. "It's fine thanks. My joints feel like they are on fire." Loki nodded. "Well the venom is meant to make you easier to digest so it is likely to attack bones and joints to make you more manageable." he placed a hand to his head. "You are still feverish." Steve waved him away. "I'm fine. I run hot." Loki huffed. "You are most certainly not. I will be back with you medicine, call Jarvis should you need me sooner." 

He laid back in bed. He remembered having rheumatic fever as a kid and this seemed worse. It even hurt to blink. Loki was back a moment later with a mug of something that smelled awful. “Here drink this.” He moved the mug away. “Not until you tell me what it is. It smells like boiled sweaty socks stuffed in something dead.” Loki rolled his eyes and with a flick of his hand had Steve’s head forced back practically dumping the mugs contents down his throat. “I told you that you were still dealing with venom. Unless you want your bones to turn to gelatin I suggest you stop being a child and do as I say.” He could see his eyes had now gone wide and he was shaking. “Captain? Jarvis? What on earth is wrong with him now?”

“I believe he is having a panic attack. He is prone to these especially when they trigger memories of the Valkyrie.” Loki was all too familiar with panic attacks having had them himself and over the last few years helping Thor with his share of them. He did everything but nothing was getting through. Jarvis began to pipe in “You have to calm him down should I call for help?” He was beginning to see that this was far from a normal panic attack. Whatever trauma he suffered at the hands of this Valkyrie must have been severe. He decided to put his magic to work. If he wouldn't listen to Loki perhaps he would listen to someone else. He closed his eyes and placed a hand on his heart trying to connect to the person the Captain wanted most right now. He didn't recognize the woman who started back at him in the mirror. Her red hair was in a thick braid. She was small and yet there was a fierceness about her that told him she was not to be trifled with. 

Turning his attention back to Steve he resumed talking through the panic attack. He could feel the fever burning his body as he rubbed his hand on his back. He looked up at him confused. “Ma?” Loki should have figured that out. He would have to choose his next words carefully. “Shhhhh just a dream love. You need to take your medicine. Will you take it for me?” He nodded acting as if he were a child. “Yes Ma’am. I will.” He noticed a curious change in his voice. Perhaps the fever brought it on. He took the opportunity to retrieve another mug of the anti-venom that he had painstakingly made. Jarvis had advised him to double if not triple the dosage because of Rogers enhanced metabolism. He returned with the mug which Steve took and drank with no protest. He patted his head and pulled the covers back up. “Now get some rest.” He relaxed no questions asked and was soon fast asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

He paced around wondering about the Valkyrie. He wasn’t aware that any had been on midgard but then again he was surprised to find in the last few years there were any left. “Jarvis, what can you tell me about Captain Rogers incident with the Valkyrie.” Before He received an answer from Jarvis a voice behind him answered. “That was the plane I went down in. The one I was supposed to die in.” He turned to see that Steve was out of bed. He looked better but still worn out and a bit flushed. “Oh Captain.” He hadn’t realized he was still appearing as Mrs. Rogers until Steve froze. “Ma?” Loki quickly turned back. “My apologies Captain. You had a panic attack and this was the only form that you seemed to listen to. I meant no disrespect. My magic chose it.” He took a seat in the chair nearby. 

“I guess I mentioned the plane in my panic?” Loki moved closer. “No you said nothing. Jarvis informed me that something triggered memories of the Valkyrie. Would it be too much to ask about the incident?” Steve took a deep breath. “It was the last mission I took. After Bucky fell. I was on a rampage. It ended with me taking a plane full of bombs down into the arctic ocean. I assumed...no I hoped it would kill me. Instead I was painfully aware of everything as my body froze and water filled my lungs and stomach.” Loki was wide-eyed having realized what he had done. “If I had known I would have never forced you to drink like that. I know what it is like to suffer but not die. I never wish it on anyone. I did also notice your voice changed on me. There was some kind of…”  
“Accent?” He nodded. “Well if I saw you standing there as my ma you probably heard the Irish side of me come through. It got buried under the Brooklyn accent and over time i managed a more neutral tone, it helps when you speak multiple languages. I must have been really far gone for that to happen.” Loki smiled “You were. Jarvis was ready to call for help. I will say had I known appearing as your mother would have gotten you to listen I would have done it hours ago. She must have been a stern woman.” 

He saw Steve’s expression soften. “If she was alive at the time She would have been able to end world war two on her own. Buck used to joke that she would be pulling Hitler along by his ear making him regret being born. I owe everything to her. She raised me mostly on her own. I wonder if she was still alive at the time, would I have still taken the serum.” Loki smiled “I think we both know you would have done that regardless but it sounds as though your mother may have dragged both you and sergeant Barnes back home by your ears.” He laughed “Probably. I know it is a rough topic but did you know what exactly you were doing in Stuttgart?”   
“What do you mean Captain?” He shifted uncomfortably. “Did you know what you were saying or more importantly where you were saying it?” His brow tightened “I’m not sure I understand what you mean. Can you explain?” 

“Well it’s just...The reason I went to war, the people Bucky and I were fighting, they were loyal to Adolf Hitler. Hitler took over Germany promising to make things better for them after a previous war and the repercussions of helping to start it decimated their country. He did so by placing blame on minorities and social "undesirables" and convinced people that destroying them would make things better. He especially targeted Jewish people. They rounded people up in camps and abused them, used them for experiments and came up with creative ways to kill them by the hundreds if not thousands. The effects of that war are still felt to this day by many especially those of the Jewish faith and heritage. The old man you challenged and tried to kill was Jewish and when he saw you standing in a place Hitler stood promising salvation for submission he saw another Hitler.” Loki was quiet for a moment. “I think….knowing that….my actions may have been heavily influenced by Thanos and the Other, that sounds like the sort of madness the titan would have admired. I have seen war and I fought in it but our wars were always with warriors. We never took it into their homes. I am not familiar with the history of your world but it would seem I could benefit from learning it. You are much more complex than I gave you credit for.” 

Steve got up and grabbed a book off the shelf. “This one will explain more of what I told you.” He glanced at the cover ‘Maus? A comic book?” He sat back down clearly exhausted from the short walk. “It’s actually a pretty good account. It’s used in schools and universities world wide. I’m biased because I love comic books but I recommend it. There are tons of books on it. Jarvis can give you a comprehensive list I’m sure.” 

He was soon asleep in the chair. Loki grabbed a blanket for him and sat down to continue reading the book. Jarvis had a list ready for him and He was surprised that Steve had most of the recommended books. As he read he could hear Steve’s stomach growling. He would have to feed him sooner or later. “Jarvis what sort of food does the Captain consider comfort food?” The A.I. threw up several items on the screen in front of him. “There are several places he normally orders from when he is looking for comfort food. His most favorite of these options is barley soup from a place down the street. They do not however deliver. You will have to get it yourself. I can place an order with them in the Captain’s name. They will know how much he normally eats. Feel free to look at the menu and select something for yourself before I place it." He looked at the menu and decided to get the same as the Captain since he had no idea what half of these things were. 

He arrived to pick it up and was greeted by an old woman. Her eyes narrowed when he informed her that he was there for Captain Rogers order. “Wha’ did tha’ idiot do now?” He smiled “Oh you know the usual pigheadedness that gets him into trouble. This time it was a large magical snake.” She shook her head. “Tha’ boy musta given his ma a whole head a grey hairs.” She sent him off with two large tubs of soup and several other things because she insisted he needed to eat more and sent him back on his way. When he returned Steve was not on the chair. “Jarvis? Where on earth is he?” He could then hear the shower. “Captain Rogers said he felt gross and needed a shower.” He nodded “That we can both agree on. He definitely reeked of sickness.” He had just finished unpacking the food when Steve came back out. “Jarvis said you were going to Tullymound’s but I wasn’t sure if you really were.” 

He began digging through the containers, fixing himself something to eat. “The old woman at the counter says you are an idiot.” He laughed nearly snorting soup across the table. “That would be Maybel. I was friends with her mother. Her grandmother was a suffragette with my mom and they all came over on the boat together.” Loki was poking at the soup. “What is that?” Steve looked at him “The soup?” He shook his head “No i know what the soup is I meant a suffragette, what is that?”   
“Ooooo they were women who fought for equal rights not just here but all over the world. Women were not allowed to vote among other things. My mom and many others believed that they should be on equal footing with the men. Sadly even now there are still wage gaps and arbitrary laws about women's bodies but at least they can do more about it.” Loki had finally taken a spoon full of the soup and had decided it was edible. “I see, so your family has always made a habit of fighting for justice?” He smiled "as far as my Ma and I yea. My Da died in the first world war. I never really got to know him and my grandparents didn’t make the trip over from Ireland because they were in poor health.” There was the accent again. “Do you always lapse into that accent or is this because of your illness?” He laughed. “It happens when I talk about home and Ma. Not too many people ask about her so it doesn’t come up often.”

Loki was now poking at a shepherds pie, eyeing it with a mix of confusion and near disgust. "Your teammates don’t ask you about these things? I would think knowing one’s team would make for a stronger bond.” He was still poking at the pie “What in all the realms is this? It looks like it should be fed to pigs.” Steve was now fixing himself a rather generous portion. “It’s Shepherds pie. Potatoes and veggies sometimes meat if you can afford it. Try it, it’s much better than it looks.” Loki finally tried it, looking as if it might kill him. Steve watched as his expression carefully changed into one of enjoyment. “I take it you like that, what did you call it, pig food?” He nodded "much better than the soup In my opinion.” He smiled and took the bowl away. “Well if you don’t want it I will gladly eat it. So have you actually had food from around here? Midgard I mean. You don’t exactly eat with us so I never know.” He shrugged. “Not exactly. I normally just use my magic to keep me sustained however I used quite a bit of it on you over the last few days so I admit I had no choice. Dining with Thor is a very trying experience and I don’t feel the others really want me around them. I know they have their reasons.”

He felt bad knowing he was one of those people. “Well I admit I had my doubts but all things considered you aren’t as bad as you seem. I know what it’s like to feel lost. I disappeared for 70 years and came back to an entirely different world. Thor does handle it in his own way, I would be happy to help you handle it in your’s. Perhaps you can tag along when I go out. I've been looking for old places. It's fun you should come. I bet you have never had a hot dog yet have you?” Loki wrinkled his nose. “No I have not. I am very much aware of them though.” They finished dinner Loki listening to Steve tell him about the different foods he should try. He was even able to get Him to finish the anti venom without much fuss. 

The next afternoon the team arrived back at the tower. Steve and Loki were sitting in the common room, Loki reading a book and Steve Drawing. They had agreed not to tell the team about the snake since they didn’t want anyone to worry. Thor ruined that. "Something reeks of anti-venom." Loki couldn’t help the smirk. Thor stopped near Steve. “Captain, Is that you? What the hell did you get into?” Loki knew there was no hiding it any longer. “Captain Idiot tried to fight the midgard serpent without any help. Go ahead Captain show them all what happens when you are stupid.” Loki had now made his shirt disappear to reveal the bandages around his arm and midsection. “You are quite lucky My brother is good with anti venoms.” Loki rolled his eyes “I wouldn’t be if you were not an Idiot as well.” Tony crossed his arms. "Christ sake Steve you aren’t indestructible. Even cockroaches die.”   
He rolled his eyes. "Guy's I'm fine really." He winced as Clint poked him in the side. Everyone was surprised when Loki growled at him and swatted his hand away. Thor could have sworn he heard him say "mine."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading kudos and comments greatly appreciated


	3. Chapter 3

Loki paced in his room. He had done a lot of thinking about what Steve had told him. Between that and the books he felt like even more of a monster. He would never in a million years do anything as vile as the things Hitler had done. Yes he was manipulative and he had his bad moments but bigotry and racism was not his thing. He had learned a lot from both Thor and careful time spent with midgardians. He knew he could make things right but he wasn't sure how. 

Steve trudged into his room and sat in his chair. He hadn't even noticed Loki sitting at the table until he cleared his throat. "Not now Loki. It's been a long week." He got up and moved to the couch. "I need your help. I...want to find someone." Steve sighed. Loki now came and went as he pleased on Steve's floor if he had a question or wanted to borrow a book. He sometimes had no regard for an aching tired super soldier. "It's your back again isn't it? Or is it the hip?" He waved him off "who do you need to find and can it wait till I get some sleep?" 

"The old man…...from Stuttgart. I want to apologize." Steve sat up a bit. "Loki, it's been quite a long time there is a chance he is no longer alive." He frowned "I am aware of that chance but…..I….I have been thinking about what you told me a few weeks ago and after reading the books I was horrified to be ranked in line with such a vile person. I want to make it clear I did not understand what I did and where I did it. Will you help me?" Steve was silent for a moment. Loki wondered if he had fallen asleep. "Captain?"  
"Yea I'll help but um…. I'm gonna need to ask Nat. There is also the process of reaching out. You can't just drop in on them."

Loki smiled. "Thank you Captain. Whatever help you can offer I am grateful just please be discreet. I want this to be genuine, not something to be a media spectacle." He grabbed the blanket and tossed it over him. "You should get that hip looked at as well as your back. Super soldier or not you have a breaking point. Your team understands that." He patted his hand. "Some rest will help. We will start looking for him tomorrow ok Lokes?" He nodded and walked out. 

He decided to get a head start and went to find Natasha. He asked Jarvis where she was. He was surprised to learn she was for once in her suite. He knocked quietly on the door. She answered in a pink bathrobe, her hair wrapped in a towel. "What brings you to my door?" He shifted nervously. "Ah yes um...Natasha um… Steve said you could help find someone." Her brows knitted together.

"Something we need to worry about?" He shook his head "no no. At least I don't think so. The man….from Germany. When we first met. I want to find him. I want to…...apologize." she gestured toward the couch. "What's your aim here? Why now? Why him?" He sat down. "Captain Rogers lent me some rather eye opening material about the war he fought in. I had no idea I was being made to parody such a particular smear in history. I feel downright awful." She nodded "well let's see what we can see shall we?"

After a few hours of searching and phone calls Natasha got a hit. "Wow. Looks like you have a chance to make amends. Mr. Issac Grossman moved to the United States two years ago under the care of his two children. He lives in New Jersey too, volunteers at a community center. I bet Steve would be happy to take you when he's up for it." Loki frowned "Does he always hurt?" Natasha shrugged "he's a super soldier he'll bounce back."

"Do you all operate under the guise that he doesn't hurt? Tell me does your shoulder still ache from time to time after your injury at the hands of the winter soldier? Does stark not experience pain in his chest despite being told he is healed? Healing does not mean pain free. You all treat him like he is indestructible. He is resilient, yes but he can't keep taking every hit out there." She looked at him shocked. 

"He has never said he was in pain.” Loki rolled his eyes. “How often has he been truthful about his physical state?” I seem to remember the first week I was in the tower I found him trying to dislodge a bullet from his thigh on his own. Do you not remember the time he told you he would walk off a concussion only to stumble OFF a rooftop? It is clear that he will never admit he is hurt or hurting. Why I have no idea because even Thor will admit when he needs a healer but whatever your society has put into his thick skull has him believe you would all sooner he suffer in silence rather than... than... than….” He was now blushing as Natasha raised an eyebrow. “Than what? You seem to be...invested in this. You have a crush don’t you?” He shook his head and stood from the couch. “No I..it’s just...I...my reasons for concern are none of your business you should turn your thoughts toward the Captain.” He quickly exited the room and raced back to his floor. 

He wrapped his arms around himself as he sunk to the floor. It wasn’t a romantic feeling. He just didn’t know what to describe it as. He hated every time he saw the Captain come back from a job broken and bloodied. It seemed as if his team was content to let him rot. How could they? Would they treat Thor with the same disregard? Did they? He shuddered as he took a breath. No wonder so many of midgards protectors were so broken. He knew for a fact that he owed the Captain for taking care of Thor in his absence. He got himself together and went across the hall to where Thor stayed. He knocked quietly half hoping Thor wouldn’t answer.

As he turned to leave the door swung open. "Loki, my dear brother, what brings you to call?" He looked around nervously "I...I….need to come in." Thor nodded and stepped aside. "Is something wrong? Are you hurt brother?" Loki shook his head "hurt, no. Something wrong…...possibly." Thor nodded "go on." He shook his head "I don't know it is all so stupid. I can't understand what is wrong with me." 

Thor smiled warmly. "Has this anything to do with your affections for the Captain?" Loki began to stammer. "I harbor no such feelings for that self righteous goody two shoes!" Thor chuckled "I was defiant with my feelings the first time I fell for someone. Deep emotions can be scary at first but not a bad thing even if the outcome is not the desired one." Loki huffed at him. "I have not fallen for anyone. Just because he bats his baby blue eyes and flashes that innocent smile does not mean he has me wrapped around his overpowered finger." Thor's booming laughter rang through the apartment. "It seems I have heard this exact conversation in reverse. I assure you there is nothing wrong with you for finding a companion in the Captain. You see quite a lot of each other especially since we left you two alone last month."

Loki gaped at Thor. "Just because I have...have…HUMORED the Captain's invitations to learn of Midgard does not mean anything." Thor continued to smile at him with that stupid grin. "Say what you will brother but I am not the only one who notices." Loki growled and got up. "I do not know why I bothered coming to you. You are worse than the Widow." He left slamming the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading :)


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning Steve was not at breakfast. Jarvis reported that he hadn't even left his room. He entered and found Steve had left the chair. "Captain?" He called out carefully listening for a reply. "Bedroom." He heard him pant from the other room. He walked in to find Steve in bed still.

"Jarvis said you have yet to leave your room. Are you in need of help?" Steve closed his eyes and groaned. "I think… I think I screwed my back up. It hurts to move. I can't even get comfortable in bed." Loki took a deep breath. "Perhaps I can help. May I touch you?" He gave a short nod.

Loki climbed into the bed and carefully rolled Steve onto his stomach. He began to knead the muscles on his back. He pressed and worked at them until he heard Steve let out a deep moan. "God...feels good" he growled. Loki scrambled off the bed,his heart racing. "I….umm...I will fetch your heating pad." He moved out to the hall. His hands trembled as he tried to compose himself. He soon found the pad and returned to the bedroom. Steve was now sitting up doing his best to deal with a very clear erection with some dignity.

He saw Loki frozen in the doorway. "Shit...sorry I thought you kinda left me. I swear….it's the serum. It makes me very…..sensitive." Loki's eyes were still locked on his lap which was now covered with a blanket. He blushed and handed the heating pad to him. "Stay in bed today. Rest. Tell Jarvis if you need something." 

He scrambled out of the room and ran into Natasha as he hurried into the elevator. "Well someone's all hot and bothered today aren't they? And you just cam from Steve’s floor."  
"NO….NO...I'm...no I'm perfectly fine." She raised an eyebrow. "Jarvis, stop the elevator." She looked at Loki "what happened?" He was backed against the wall. "No….I don't wish to speak of it. Please just leave me be."   
"Ok. We’re good Jarvis, continue."

*******************************************************************************************************************************************************  
Steve laid on the bed feeling embarrassed and sore. "Jarvis, can you call Sam for me?" He waited for the call to go through. "Steve, If I had a lead on Barnes I would have told you."  
"Hi Sam, it's not that. I um...something happened." Before he could continue Sam panicked. "Are you hurt? Where are you? Do you need me to get you?" 

"No. I'm good it's just. Well …ok it's not good. I threw out my back and-"  
"You threw out your back? That's something you can do?"   
"Sam… Loki tried to help and I might have enjoyed it a bit too much and things got...awkward. Then there's Thor who insists I'm spending time with Loki because I like him and god Sam. I'm so confused." He was silent for a while and Steve honestly thought he had hung up. 

"Well do you like him? Think carefully. I know you have feelings for Barnes but that ship may have sailed and depriving yourself of something that makes you honestly happy isn't healthy." He blew out a breath. "I'm not sure. All i know is Loki doesn't make me feel stupid, we seem to have reached an understanding in the last month or so. I can't explain it. He rubbed my back, that's all he did and every bit of me went haywire. I know the serum makes me super sensitive and his hands were all over me and it was just so good." He could now hear Sam laughing on the other end.

"Dude. You are smitten. Don't even try and blame the serum because Nat said when you kissed her, she had gotten more action from a dead fish than she got from you. Seriously any other guy would have killed to be in your place. I would have killed to be in your place." He scrubbed his hands over his face. "Ok well what do I do?" 

"It's your choice if you want to act on this. I mean if you think Loki can handle that I say go for it. Not everyday you get a chance with a god unless there's things you and Thor ain't tellin' me." He chuckled "No Sam. No secrets there."

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Loki found Thor in his room reading a book. "I have messed up. Please erase me from existence." Thor rolled his eyes at his sibling’s dramatics as he looked up from his book. "Brother it is not as bad as you think I’m sure." Loki shook his head "oh no i think it is." He proceeded to explain to Thor what had happened. He responded with a laugh and patted Loki on the back.

"It appears the affection is mutual. How long has it been since someone warmed your bed brother?" He gawked at Thor. "Who I bed is none of your concern." Thor pulled out a bottle and gave it to him. "This is the salve I use for my aching muscles when normal methods fail. Perhaps you can help him find relief. Do not be afraid of this. Steven has been very lonely and I know you have as well. Let whatever happens happen and may the Norns treat you well."

Loki took the bottle and walked back over to his room. He had never felt affection like this. He couldn't shake the image from earlier nor could he unhear the moan. It was deep as if the sound had neve escaped him before. He wanted to make him melt in his hands as he did before. He shuddered as he tried to push his thoughts from his mind. He felt an ache low in himself and he wanted to act on it more than anything right now. He tossed the bottle onto the bedside table and tried to forget everything. He received a message from Steve a while later. “Tomorrow morning we are going to see Mr. Grossman if you are up for it.” Loki groaned at the message. He had asked for this and now for once he was getting what he asked for. “Fine I will be waiting for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading take care


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